Life has been difficult for me as of late. Nothing has really happened, I’ve just been feeling really depressed and it’s taken it’s toll on many areas of my life.
One night I was really having a rough night and just broke down. Eric and I sat talking for probably a good 2 hours that night. Okay, so Eric was doing the talking and I was blubbering. And just for the sake of clearning the air – our conversation wasn’t an argument between the two of us. Eric was really just trying to help me feel better.
Well, the saddest part of me breaking down is that it was early enough in the evening that the kids were around. For the most part they just went about their business and they knew I was sad, but they also saw that Daddy was helping Mommy through things.
So when bedtime came, we all went to bed and I thought nothing really more about what had happened. Then I woke up to this:
She had notes that were serious, some that were silly, some that were humorous and some she just drew fun pictures on. In total she had 40 something notes. (I only know that cause one of her notes said, “I thought I’d stop at 28…but I decided to do all 46.”
I’d be remiss if I didn’t bring Tanis into this entry. While during the course of our conversation, Tanis wanted me to know that when he was feeling sad, he liked to look at Disney quotes. The next morning he sent me an email with this:
If my kids feel like I’m doing a good job and they’re happy – that is really all that should matter.
Around this same time, I saw something on Facebook and other things that brought home the fact that my children are MY children and while other people may do things differently, it shouldn’t matter. I know my children and what they each need and they came to me for a reason!